I had one of the very best weekends of my life. Each year my youth group takes a trip in the middle of January for some Christ-centered, snowy fun. I am not super into rolling around in the snow, but it is always a highlight of my year. However, last year, light was shed on some insecurities and character flaws I never knew I had… thus resulting in a not so great trip that ended with me sick in bed for a week.
As you can imagine, as this trip approached I started to get really nervous. It felt like I had this could of fear hovering over me all week long. I was scared I would get hurt, overlooked, be left alone, and that I would be broken again.
You’d think I would have learned how to handle fear by now…testimony. And honestly, I thought I had this under control. But boy was I wrong.
I have been doing well in this category for awhile. I haven’t been stressing over things and have been overcoming fear and thought it was totally out of my life.
But something strange happened, the moment I felt fear it was comforting. It was like fear was saying, “wow it’s been a while old friend, let’s catch up.” Suddenly all of the things I’d successfully avoided can rushing in. I started stressing about things on my to-do list and fretting about the trip.
The devil started turning this amazing weekend trip into something I was dreading.
I knew that it was way too late to back out so I needed to find a way to prepare myself for anything the devil could throw at me.
I prayed… A LOT
I started praying over everything I was nervous of. I started praying for the girls I’d be with, for safety, for the Lord to comfort me when I feel worthless and cast aside. I prayed for the Lord to help me respond in godly ways and for Him to be the focus and always on my mind. I wish I would have started praying for this trip earlier. I know now that I will start praying for things very far in advance.
I read, memorized, and shared
After prayer over each possible curveball the devil could throw, I flipped open my Bible and started getting to work. I read that thing like a maniac. I even used my concordance of the Bible to fully understand the meanings of the words God was telling me. I then found verses like,
“Instead he delighted in the Lord’s instructions and meditated on them night and day.” Psalms 1:1
So that when I wanted to worry or cry I would INSTEAD meditate on the Lord’s instructions. This was huge for me. Choosing how I would respond to situations and telling myself how to live. FYI, It’s so hard to listen to yourself sometimes but it is worth it.
I was even able to share some of the cool things I’d learned from my preparation with one of my close friends. Being able to verbally say the things I’d learned helped me to really believe them and hold onto them.
I talked with my mentors
The as you can tell, the week leading up to my trip was pretty packed. But I still felt like I needed some more preparation. I was able to talk to some people who have shaped the person I am today. Through these conversations, I was able to hear their advice and get a much-needed life update.
These amazing people were able to give me tangible things to remember whenever an uncomfortable situation occurred. I was given godly advice that helped me tye everything together.
After a nice coffee date with one of my most favorite people, I finally felt ready (it was also the last day before the trip so good thing I “felt” ready.)
Luckily, the trip was amazing and one I will always remember. I was totally prepared, so much so that I was able to be confident in Christ and let go of fear. It was an amazing feeling to kick fear to the curb and keep walkin’.
I was able to worship without worrying, share without shame, and live my awesome life without fear of others laughing.
With all of that said, I have learned a huge lesson from this last week. You can’t walk into situations blinded. As Christians, we need to prepare and get ready for battle. Because this war against sin is ongoing but also won. The King of kings defeated the devil and his time is running out. The devil will push all your buttons and try to reopen past wounds. Be prepared to fight back.
I hope you guys can find some encouragement in this as you enter this week. You all are amazing and wonderful and if you’re going through anything I’d love to encourage you through it. Just leave a little comment!
XOXO, The Christian Prepster